I recently felt a bit shitty musically. I've attended this amazing local meetup of producers. Everyone played their tracks on big badass club system, everyone talked, made some new friends. Amazing time.
...but then I went home and it got to me. There were people as much as 6 years younger that were playing totally amazing tracks. And not just preset/loops stackers. Proper producers with a real sound-design knowledge. For last few days I failed to feel ... well ... worthy. Motivation was gone for a while. It's getting better, though. Thankfully.
...but why the hell I feel this? I'm happy for those guys and for the music they are able to make. It's awesome. I hate selfish thinking and I'm not in this for fame or money. Yet these thoughts appeared and bugged me for few days. I'm confused.
I'm "grown", married, have a real, full-time, non-music job and I feel this all the time. Lots of young producers with lots of talent. But I think it's gotta be a personal journey. You have to do music for yourself. To make yourself feel good, to make something you're proud of, etc. To make it only to be "better than xyz" will lead to a lot of anxiety.
You're alright, man. Take it easy and make some sounds and tunes that you like.
I have a mantra that, oddly enough, I have to repeat to myself often. It is: Do what makes you happy.
That simple, mate