So the actual link doesn't work because soundcloud players doesn't allow private link. But I've managed to get it anyway.

So the ideas are very cool but the rest doesn't follow.

First, you need actual basses. The high pitched lead is a good idea but it needs to be supported by a low mid bass and a sub. Kick needs to be powerfull and snare less wet.

then you need to mix it right. try this : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RBqgh_mvkys
for the main idea follow this tutorials. it will help you identify the different part of the track.