Author Topic: Help me!!!My parents are driving me nuts.  (Read 4445 times)

The Dog

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Help me!!!My parents are driving me nuts.
« on: January 19, 2016, 04:00:53 pm »
So, I'm just a regular INDIAN kid and i'm quite mad about producing music and I keep myself hooked to my DAW most of the time. But the problem is my PARENTS are not as cool about this as I am. They think I'm gonna go insane literally if I keep up this shit. I produce for about 3-4 hrs in a stretch and do this almost the whole day. I know its just normal to produce for long periods but my parents are old school and they keep restraining me quite a lot from producing (They think its a waste of time). It is f**king my mind up and my creativity. How do I make my parents cool about this?

cryophonik

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Re: Help me!!!My parents are driving me nuts.
« Reply #1 on: January 19, 2016, 07:10:08 pm »
Your parents aren't "old school", they're just wise and they know from experience that you're better off keeping maintaining a balanced perspective in life, getting a good education, having an active social life, and staying fit, both physically and mentally.  There's nothing "cool" about a mouse-clicking dork with his head buried in a computer all day.
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manducator

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Re: Help me!!!My parents are driving me nuts.
« Reply #2 on: January 19, 2016, 07:38:28 pm »
I have to agree with cryophonik. Life is about balance.

Marrow Machines

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Re: Help me!!!My parents are driving me nuts.
« Reply #3 on: January 20, 2016, 12:52:26 am »
Life is music, but your life shouldn't be music.

It becomes an addiction at that point, and some times what you really need to be when being creative is silence.

If you're a teenager, your brain wants to chase the high more so than an adult because it feel so much better to you as a teenager due to an over active "rewards system".

I was like you man, but honestly you should listen to your parents. You really have to have an environment that allows you to do that entirely, and more often than not, these professionals have made sacrifices to be able to do what they do as a career.

I am majoring in mechanical engineering, and that brings me closer to building my own studio with the work that i will do when i graduate.

You can't give water to some one if your cup is empty.
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Joseph

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Re: Help me!!!My parents are driving me nuts.
« Reply #4 on: January 20, 2016, 01:07:36 am »
So, I'm just a regular INDIAN kid and i'm quite mad about producing music and I keep myself hooked to my DAW most of the time. But the problem is my PARENTS are not as cool about this as I am. They think I'm gonna go insane literally if I keep up this shit. I produce for about 3-4 hrs in a stretch and do this almost the whole day. I know its just normal to produce for long periods but my parents are old school and they keep restraining me quite a lot from producing (They think its a waste of time). It is f**king my mind up and my creativity. How do I make my parents cool about this?

Like cryophonik said, they have a lot more experience and wisdom compared to you, and they only want what's best for you. I honestly wish I had listened to my parents more, because my life would be so much better if I had. Not many parents want to see their child pursuing a career that is hard to make a living off of, they'd rather see their kid be a lawyer/doctor/engineer because then they'll at least know that you won't go broke.
They could also see producing as a short term thing that you got hooked into. When I was in high school I literally spent 8 hours a day almost everyday coding, it was fun for a few months, but then I lost interest. In my case, coding was beneficial because our current society is driven by technology, but music production isn't going to help you land a job in any field aside from music, and I think that's what your parents are worried about.
I'm not saying you're not going to continue to produce music and pursue it as a job, I'm just saying there's a possibility that you find something else you enjoy more and might end up regretting the fact that you wasted tons of hours on something that didn't really benefit you.
« Last Edit: January 20, 2016, 01:09:28 am by Joseph »
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Ninth Parallel

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Re: Help me!!!My parents are driving me nuts.
« Reply #5 on: January 20, 2016, 01:09:46 am »
Just keep pushing. I'm speaking from experience of dealing with notoriously Indian parents. Channel your everything into your work and try not to lose yourself in the process. Music has so much to offer your life, I know the cultural pressures can feel crushing and tear you apart, but for your sake take control and fucking do this shit! When I was in school I was staying up till 4 am every night in secret just to work on music. Barely got any sleep! Let your work speak for your ambition, just keep pushing my man. Music can change your world if you work hard enough. Wishing you the best!
« Last Edit: January 20, 2016, 01:10:21 am by daydreamer »

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Re: Help me!!!My parents are driving me nuts.
« Reply #6 on: January 20, 2016, 01:17:26 am »
Just keep pushing. I'm speaking from experience of dealing with notoriously Indian parents. Channel your everything into your work and try not to lose yourself in the process. Music has so much to offer your life, I know the cultural pressures can feel crushing and tear you apart, but for your sake take control and fucking do this shit! When I was in school I was staying up till 4 am every night in secret just to work on music. Barely got any sleep! Let your work speak for your ambition, just keep pushing my man. Music can change your world if you work hard enough. Wishing you the best!

fucking agreed. i've seen rishi (ninth parallel) go through hell for the past three years, not only from his parents but also having to go through SEVERE self-induced anxiety and depression. however, after all of that, he has gotten so many achievements such as doing a mini tour with madeon, doing an official remix for porter robinson, and more with his upcoming release. he also helped create this forum with mat (and has gotten extreme respect from him), so that's pretty huge as well. yeah, in some cases parents are wiser and correct, but it's not as black and white as a lot of people make it out to be. if you put in the work and do this stuff for 12 hours a day, and you're willing to prove yourself, you're going to make it in society. don't let anyone EVER dwindle your ambition.
« Last Edit: January 20, 2016, 01:25:20 am by om_neb »
On 12/29/15, at 11:11 PM, rishi wrote:
> Mad Money Mad Bitches Records

daydreamer

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Re: Help me!!!My parents are driving me nuts.
« Reply #7 on: January 20, 2016, 01:37:36 am »
Your parents aren't "old school", they're just wise and they know from experience that you're better off keeping maintaining a balanced perspective in life, getting a good education, having an active social life, and staying fit, both physically and mentally.

i don't agree at all. especially in his case. ive seen it in ninth parallel's (rishi's) case: with most indian families and indian culture, you have to fill in a certain role in society and if you don't you're an absolute failure. they will provide you with financial and physical health support, but mental and emotional health is NOT taken care of.

Quote
There's nothing "cool" about a mouse-clicking dork with his head buried in a computer all day.

do you know who created this forum you're on? do you know who most successful/iconic electronic musicians are? they are EXACTLY what you just described. they are total nerds that were so passionate about their craft that they did nothing but bury their faces in electronics all day every day.
« Last Edit: January 20, 2016, 01:42:18 am by daydreamer »

The Dog

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Re: Help me!!!My parents are driving me nuts.
« Reply #8 on: January 20, 2016, 06:15:17 am »
Just keep pushing. I'm speaking from experience of dealing with notoriously Indian parents. Channel your everything into your work and try not to lose yourself in the process. Music has so much to offer your life, I know the cultural pressures can feel crushing and tear you apart, but for your sake take control and fucking do this shit! When I was in school I was staying up till 4 am every night in secret just to work on music. Barely got any sleep! Let your work speak for your ambition, just keep pushing my man. Music can change your world if you work hard enough. Wishing you the best!

So you're Indian too and had to go through that Indian parents thing too. I know man Indian parents are hard to get on with because they care about the society more than the kid itself. They don't care about he kid's dreams and aspirations but want him to have a steady paying job so that he can be married off to some girl and have kids and then they live happily ever after. BULLSHIT!!! Who wants that life if you're not satisfied with what you have and are. But thanks for your advice and I hope maybe one day I'll also be where you are and all the best to you too!!! :)

The Dog

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Re: Help me!!!My parents are driving me nuts.
« Reply #9 on: January 20, 2016, 06:20:06 am »
Your parents aren't "old school", they're just wise and they know from experience that you're better off keeping maintaining a balanced perspective in life, getting a good education, having an active social life, and staying fit, both physically and mentally.

i don't agree at all. especially in his case. ive seen it in ninth parallel's (rishi's) case: with most indian families and indian culture, you have to fill in a certain role in society and if you don't you're an absolute failure. they will provide you with financial and physical health support, but mental and emotional health is NOT taken care of.

Quote
There's nothing "cool" about a mouse-clicking dork with his head buried in a computer all day.

do you know who created this forum you're on? do you know who most successful/iconic electronic musicians are? they are EXACTLY what you just described. they are total nerds that were so passionate about their craft that they did nothing but bury their faces in electronics all day every day.

Exactly!!! :D

cryophonik

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Re: Help me!!!My parents are driving me nuts.
« Reply #10 on: January 20, 2016, 07:54:03 am »
The thing is, you don't have to waste your youth by staring at a computer every waking minute to be successful.  I lived for 15 years as a professional musician, earned a degree in music theory/composition, made a solid income gigging, doing session work, and working as an audio engineer, and used that income to put myself through advanced degrees in science, all while having an active social life, staying fit, being an avid outdoorsman, etc.  Work smarter, not longer.  Get some real life experience to draw your inspiration from and to keep up your personal skills (you'll want that to be successful in almost any career).  Also, realize that the days of getting successful by making the same repetitive music as the countless other bedroom producers (i.e., your competition) is not a smart long-term bet because that trend won't be around forever.  Your parents know this.  As a parent myself and someone who has a lot of experience in the music industry (even though I never wanted a long-term career in music), I know this.  So, take my advice or ignore it, because it won't affect me either way.  But, the reality is that not everybody who parks himself in front of a computer for several years is going to be the next big thing.  Have your dreams, but don't let that stop you from having realistic goals, and definitely don't let that stop you from having a life or a solid education.  Good luck in whatever you do.
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Joseph

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Re: Help me!!!My parents are driving me nuts.
« Reply #11 on: January 20, 2016, 08:14:47 am »
Quote
There's nothing "cool" about a mouse-clicking dork with his head buried in a computer all day.

do you know who created this forum you're on? do you know who most successful/iconic electronic musicians are? they are EXACTLY what you just described. they are total nerds that were so passionate about their craft that they did nothing but bury their faces in electronics all day every day.

*points at deadmau5*

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Re: Help me!!!My parents are driving me nuts.
« Reply #12 on: January 20, 2016, 01:41:50 pm »
My parent don't like me producing music either.  So, I tried to maintain the balance between production and my school things. Well, my environment got really bad these days, but I kept going then I got my music won in a small contest, I got my track on a game. Then, they seemed to consider it more positively.
No, try again.

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Re: Help me!!!My parents are driving me nuts.
« Reply #13 on: January 20, 2016, 07:37:46 pm »
The thing is, you don't have to waste your youth by staring at a computer every waking minute to be successful.  I lived for 15 years as a professional musician, earned a degree in music theory/composition, made a solid income gigging, doing session work, and working as an audio engineer, and used that income to put myself through advanced degrees in science, all while having an active social life, staying fit, being an avid outdoorsman, etc.  Work smarter, not longer.  Get some real life experience to draw your inspiration from and to keep up your personal skills (you'll want that to be successful in almost any career).  Also, realize that the days of getting successful by making the same repetitive music as the countless other bedroom producers (i.e., your competition) is not a smart long-term bet because that trend won't be around forever.  Your parents know this.  As a parent myself and someone who has a lot of experience in the music industry (even though I never wanted a long-term career in music), I know this.  So, take my advice or ignore it, because it won't affect me either way.  But, the reality is that not everybody who parks himself in front of a computer for several years is going to be the next big thing.  Have your dreams, but don't let that stop you from having realistic goals, and definitely don't let that stop you from having a life or a solid education.  Good luck in whatever you do.

I respect your viewpoint, but we need to remember that success is not the same for everybody. not everyone wants to be an outdoorsman and a family man with a steady career and a nice house, etc.

the most important thing is for him to keep his expectations in check. like you said, music is not a reliable way to make a living, regardless of how much or how little you produce. but if he wants to get a cheap education and a modest job and spend the rest of his hours producing music, because that's what keeps him happy, I see no problems with that.
« Last Edit: January 20, 2016, 07:39:46 pm by lopryo »

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Re: Help me!!!My parents are driving me nuts.
« Reply #14 on: January 21, 2016, 01:04:42 am »
The thing is, you don't have to waste your youth by staring at a computer every waking minute to be successful.  I lived for 15 years as a professional musician, earned a degree in music theory/composition, made a solid income gigging, doing session work, and working as an audio engineer, and used that income to put myself through advanced degrees in science, all while having an active social life, staying fit, being an avid outdoorsman, etc.  Work smarter, not longer.  Get some real life experience to draw your inspiration from and to keep up your personal skills (you'll want that to be successful in almost any career).  Also, realize that the days of getting successful by making the same repetitive music as the countless other bedroom producers (i.e., your competition) is not a smart long-term bet because that trend won't be around forever.  Your parents know this.  As a parent myself and someone who has a lot of experience in the music industry (even though I never wanted a long-term career in music), I know this.  So, take my advice or ignore it, because it won't affect me either way.  But, the reality is that not everybody who parks himself in front of a computer for several years is going to be the next big thing.  Have your dreams, but don't let that stop you from having realistic goals, and definitely don't let that stop you from having a life or a solid education.  Good luck in whatever you do.

I respect your viewpoint, but we need to remember that success is not the same for everybody. not everyone wants to be an outdoorsman and a family man with a steady career and a nice house, etc.

the most important thing is for him to keep his expectations in check. like you said, music is not a reliable way to make a living, regardless of how much or how little you produce. but if he wants to get a cheap education and a modest job and spend the rest of his hours producing music, because that's what keeps him happy, I see no problems with that.


That's exactly what cryo saying. The point is that, there should be balance in making his desires possible. Yea sitting in your room all day making music is great. But unless some one approaches you through non physical means,you're probably not going to be able to realize(manifest) those desires.

Not to mention it takes a certain hustle, that is literally years (maybe months) to get to work on top of learning a craft. It's better to get your life situated and use your life experience to help get to your end goal as a person (not a producer, but can encompass being a producer).

It's your hustle, it's your journey, and it doesn't get easier.
Josh Huval: Honestly, the guys who are making good art are spending their time making it.